A day at the hairdressers

SCENE- K Hart has just had a wash, set and tong and is now sitting in the barbers chair to get the back shaped up. Considering I don’t know this man I am repeatedly telling him to SHAPE not shave the back of my hair and he did a good job! Whilst sitting in the chair a man appears from no where to the left of me

The conversation went as follows……

Jamaican man- Yuh like fi hask questions?

K-Hart- Well yeah.... I need to ask questions so that this barber doesn’t clean shave off my hair. The more questions I ask the more clearer we will be (note it’s not rocket science all he had to do was shape me up, but I was fretting a bit lol)

J-Man- Nuh worry man!

K-Hart- Hmmmm....

J Man- I like ah wuman dat hasks questions

K-Hart- O-k-a-y (side-eye)

J Man- Yuh si when a wuman hasks questions I get ah book and if I man nuh know di harnser I will fine out.

K-Hart- lol (at this point I’m thinking dude I’m trying to concentrate on this barber giving me a shape up.

J Man- Yuh look fretful.....

K-Hart -I’m not fretful (voice raising a little)

J –Man- So yuh from these ya sides?

K-Hart- No!

J-Man -Yuh seem jolly!

K-Hart -huh…..jolly?!?! (Is this man being sarcastic with me?- paranoia!)

J Man – yes yuh look like a jolly girl

K-Hart -uh huh…. err yeah I guess so

Punch Line J-Man- I would like a jolly girl like yuh!

K-Hart -errrrm (nervous laugh).... uh huh (at this point I’m thinking bruv your distracting me, I need to concentrate on this barbers every move)

Hair shape us is now finished

J Man- So wat yuh saying I man can take yuh out?

K-Hart -I’m spoken for (this line usually works even if your lying). I should have just said no thanks politely.

After returning from the ladies I pay the hairdresser and swiftly put on my coat. I am exchanging contact details with the hairdresser and J Man swaggers over with his phone. This man’s got jokes and follows me out the store with his phone in his hand. I kindly decline, wish him a good day and skip off up the road.

I sometimes think because I don’t screw up my face and I tell these men no politely that I’m encouraging them? I can’t be rude as I don't think it's necessary depending on the approach plus it's not worth my life. Men these days will switch on you just for looking at them the wrong way, well road/ghetto men will anyway. I have to say this man was very persistent and cocky with his approach I guess some women like that.

Thank you J Man for giving me indirect joke today! At least situations like this will prepare me for when I go back to visit Jamaica…..or maybe it won’t?